Have you ever woken up one morning after years of living your life and wonder, “How did I get to this point?” I mean really. Was there a sign somewhere that let you know you were headed down this path? Well try being abnormal, living amongst the normal. Then try imagining what it’s like being abnormal and not knowing you were abnormal. On top of that, everyone else knows you’re different but you just don’t see it and no one was ever able to tell you just how different you really are. That’s me. All my life that’s how it’s been and twenty five years later, I’m finally getting the answers. No I still don’t understand it but it does make sense. Samia is a regular woman whose life is about to unfold to an unimaginable new world. Her life has more meaning in death than it ever did in her human life. She is thrown into a limbo with no knowledge of her past. In order for her to get out she must find out why she was sent in the first place. Uncovering some things that were hidden may affect whether she makes it out of limbo or not. Her choice may lead to others being freed from purgatory or enslaved in darkness forever.
Preface I sat alone in a prison cell of the judgment hall in heaven. I know that I deserved to be punished for what I did. I just wish I could change everything and make all my wrongs right so no one else would have to suffer for my mistake. I had been sitting here crying in this cell for almost one hundred years. I have no knowledge of what has become of my son. I hope to God that He has mercy on my child. I couldn’t imagine what leaving him alone with Michael would be like. No child should have to suffer for the sins of their parents. We learned that already from the war with the Great Evil One. The Great Evil One has been gone for centuries but you wouldn’t guess it with the discord going on in heaven today. Michael has been scheming on this place and killing it from its once heavenly glory for ages. I have no idea why he would turn on God and the angels the way he did. No matter what his excuse is, it’s not good enough. I made a grave mistake when I chose him over Kaiaphas. He swayed me with his promises of protection and glory. He told me that if we combined we could use our powers for the better of mankind to help with the war that the Great Evil One raised centuries ago. I figured that would be a better choice for the sake of mankind. I will suffer eternally for that mistake. I had believed him. I believed that he actually cared about the humans and wanted to help them. I hated myself for believing that lie since that day. He has done nothing to the glory of God and has even impregnated human women with his vicious seed that will grow up spilling their hatred even more. My heart is heavy. I have no idea if Kaiaphas is even alive. He did not deserve to die for me. Even though I was betrothed to Michael, I tempted Kaiaphas to lie with me and professed my eternal love for him. He blindly followed me. If I would have known that it would cost us to be damned forever I would never have involved him. Sitting here gave me a lot of time to think and I honestly couldn’t think of one reason that I shouldn’t be here. I heard soldiers standing guard outside my door talking. I heard Michael’s voice in the background. Oh God, why do I have to suffer his presence? The sound of his voice stirred anger deep within me that I held inside for so long. When the door opened I picked my head up slowly to find Michael standing in front of me. He was staring at me with those strange eyes of his showing me how glad he was to see me suffer. A slow seductive smile curved around his lips. I hated it. I made no move toward him. The door closed slowly behind him. That was very unusual. I was never to be left alone with Michael…….ever. “Come to me, don’t be afraid.” He commanded in a soft voice. I rose to him slowly. He reached out and placed his hands around my waist and pulled me close. He caressed me softly and breathed in heavily. I did not return the touch. He took my hands and placed them around him. He rubbed my shoulders in a romantic way as if there was some affectionate moment going on that clearly wasn’t. He kissed my forehead and cheeks softly. Each kiss felt like it was burning into my skin. I hated when he touched me. “I love you so much” he said softly in my ear. “I have missed you. I have forgiven you” he said over and over. He placed his hands around my face and pulled me into a soft kiss. I hated that even more. I began to think of my son and figured it would be better to accept Michael and his tyranny than to stay here and leave him unprotected. I finally decided to return his affections and began to kiss him back. I hated to do this but what else was I to do. He pulled me in closer and kissed me harder. I felt like I was suffocating. He placed his hands around my waist and caressed me. I wanted him to stop but if I didn’t play along I would never see my son again. He finally let go long enough to look me in my eyes. His eyes were so eerily strange and I felt dizzy every time I looked into them. They swirled in opposite directions in two different colors. One was topaz and the other was silver. He smiled at me and played with my hair. His smile quickly faded and I felt a cold blade enter my side. I instantly felt weak and cold as the blood poured out me. I looked into those eyes and he was still smiling that evil smile at me. That bastard! I tried to raise my arm to hit him but I was too weak. He laid me down on the cold floor slowly. He stroked my hair softly as I lay there dying. He spoke to me softly “He’ll never have you. I will kill your bastard son too. I will never let your filth spread around in MY kingdom! You have cursed yourself to death.” His words were like fire and burned in my heart. Not my son. The only good that came out of this mess is my son. I needed him to live. This could not be the end. God would not allow it. I believed in my heart that God wouldn’t have it end this way. It couldn’t. It’s not His way. My eyes began to swell up with tears. I wanted to protest but I couldn’t. Michael smiled at me one last time while watching me slowly wither away. He appeared satisfied. Michael left shortly after that. I was falling into a comatose state from the blood loss. My eyes got heavier and heavier. I heard some rustling noises outside the door and some crying. I saw the small image of my son run into the room. The soldiers outside were laughing really hard. “Let him see his whore of a mother!” “That’s what happens to harlots!” They kept laughing. My son ran into the room and had a face of terror and shock that no child should have. His eyes were full of sadness and spilling over with tears. He kneeled down next to me. He placed his little hand on my face. I felt so helpless. Inside I was crying out from anger. This was beyond torture. My child should not have to see me like this. I knew nothing good would come of this. I felt my pulse come back a little as he was sitting there crying over me. I touched his tiny hand. He leaned over me. “Mommy” His little voice quivered under those tears. I was in a state of rage that I could not protect him. I had always been so weak and helpless to protect the ones I loved. I wanted to cry out but I knew I would die soon. I looked at those big beautiful amber eyes of his. “Be strong and stay hidden my son.” That was the best advice I could give him before I faded away. I would forever be in rage and anguish over what I had done.
I felt the need to write this series because I for one, love book series! I love books that continue to tell the story and go on and on and everytime you see a new one has come out, you just have to have it. It is like a Literary Soap Opera. In a lot of book series I read, I find that a lot of them have the same content and often the same themes. I was contemplating what type of book series I could write since I don't know anything about mythology, vampires, werewolves, witches or anything like that. But I do know my Bible and I often wondered what heaven would be like and was especially moved by the fall of Satan. I decided to create an entire series based around things that may help a person see what it must have been like at that time and how that lingers on today. At the same time, it is not religious based or "Bible-thumping". It shows the beauty and the wonders of heaven, but if someone knew that outside of this beautiful earth, the hardwork that the angels do, and how they have feelings and they go through battles (literally and figuratively). That even while under the very eye of God, calamity can still happen. I found an original, imaginative way to depict what it going on around us and how we still have to find out who we are to achive our destiny. I have been writing for over fifteen years and I never really found my "niche" until this came along. It was itching at me but I didn't know how to present it, what genre I would fit in or how it would be taken. I gave it to my parents and let them read it and their mouths literally dropped open while reading the book. They honestly didn't believe that I wrote it! They never knew that I had it inside of me and they saw the vision I had in bigger ways than I imagined. I let my friends read it and they found themselves yelling at times while reading the book because they were so engrossed with it. I let my husband read it and all he could think about was how close it was to his own life and it helped answer questions that he often had within himself. I never knew that I could do that. I almost gave up on writing after many agencies turned me down but my husband told me to press on and get it out there. I am glad that I took this journey and I will be forever grateful to all the help and support I received while putting this series together. While I am working on my books, I work as a Service Support Specialist and live in Dumfries with my amazing husband Oscar and I am surrounded by my family and friends throughout the Metropolitan area who I love, pray for and thank God for everyday.