A New Love
Boxes boxes everywhere! Brown ones, white ones, green ones! If I never see another box I will be so happy. I cannot believe it! Only two weeks since my mother told me and she has already packed up over half the house. Dion is acting like this is the best thing that could ever happen to him. My mom gassed his head up about going to a new school and meeting new friends and crap like that. Dion was six years old he didn’t know anything about being led to the slaughterhouse. Didn’t he realize that he would not be going back to the school where he claimed his favorite teacher in the world taught? He would not be the spelling bee champion of St. Augustine Elementary anymore. Why was he not as distraught as I was? Why was he hopping around like his world was not coming to an end in about a week and a half? I knew why he wasn’t scared. He didn’t have as much as I had to lose.
I spoke to my mom a couple of times about the move. I didn’t understand why would she wait until my senior year to do this to me! She never really responded with anything more than, “You’ll understand when you get older.” Forget that, make me understand now! I still had not told Carl yet. Only a few people knew about the move. When friends asked me about the boxes, I just made up a story that we were moving across town. I don’t know why I was in such denial, but I was determined that I was not moving. Even when my mom told me about the school I would attend, I just acted like she was not talking to me. I would be attending Bryton High and that was that. Nothing she could say or do would make me want to move. Not the boxes she packed or the Ryder truck she rented or the fact that she packed up my room one day while I was at work. I guess she realized that I was not going to do it and took it upon herself to go through my things. My personal and private world that only I knew. Well, maybe Kim knew a little.
I had just come home from school and looking over the living room I felt a sense of loathing. While silly thoughts ran through my head one popped in that was serious. Oh, my gosh! I hope she did not find my birth control pills I got from the teen clinic! Where that thought came from, I didn’t know. My heart started to race. I ran up the stairs to my room. I gazed in horror at the boxes and the dismantled dresser. Over in the corner I saw my stereo, which had been half packed in a box. I grabbed my right speaker and opened the loose backing. Out fell a brown paper bag with condoms and a small, white oval shaped box. I felt relief rush through my body. If my mother had found this, she would have had a meltdown.
About three weeks ago, Kim and I decided that we would give to our boyfriends the most precious gift we could...our virginity. She and I left school early after seventh period and caught a bus downtown to the free teen clinic. We decided that since we made such a big decision we would make sure that neither of us ended up pregnant. We had physicals and we were given our choice of birth control. I chose the pill, condoms and a type of foam. Kim just got the pills and condoms. I remember when the doctor asked, “What type do you want?” When I grabbed all three, she looked surprised. She asked me, “Why do you want three forms of birth control?” I told her that if I ever brought a baby home, my mother would kill me! She then stated to me, “If you are that scared of getting pregnant, do you really think you should be having sex?”
I thought about what she said on the bus ride home. I also thought about Carl and how our make out sessions were going way pass second base and almost rounding home. I told him that I was not on any birth control and he told me about the clinic and how I would not have to let my mom know anything. That very next day, Kim and I went to the clinic. We were both suppose to wait until the first day of our next period before we began taking them. Kim said she heard that the pill makes you gain weight, but I would rather have an extra few pounds on my thighs then to have an extra eight pounds in my womb. I heard that the pill was 99.9% effective. I figured that with the use of the condoms and me on the pill, it was almost a sure thing that I would not get pregnant. Most of my friends at school were not virgins anymore and it was only Kim and myself who wore our virginity like a badge of honor. No guy at our school or any other school could ever say that they had either one of us. We would see guys disrespect a lot of girls they had slept with. That always made me feel like that type of disrespect would never happen to me. That’s why I was always proud to let people know that I was a virgin. My body is all I have and it’s a temple. I wish that more girls knew that. Especially the ones I knew. I just wanted to be ready incase the sacred event ever took place.
I folded up my little brown bag and slid it in my purse. For safe keeping of course! I looked out my window and I saw the little kids down the street roller-blading home. It was getting dark and I knew that the streetlights were coming on soon. Some of the kids were complaining that they had to go home and others were trying to prolong the trip as much as possible. I heard one little boy yell, “Sorry guys, all good things must come to an end!” His words hit me like a ton of bricks. Come to an end, come to an end, I just kept repeating that to myself over and over again. As the sun finally set and the moon rose, I knew that even though the sunset had brought an end to the day, a bright moon always replaced it. It reminded me of how my mom always says, “The Lord doesn’t close a door without opening a window.” Well, I wish my window would open, because I can’t breathe!
Time was winding down and I still did not let Carl know that I was leaving until the last few days. I asked Carl to meet at the bus stop around my house after work. We walked and talked about a lot of things on the way home. Finally I stopped and asked Carl, “What would you do if I had to leave?” I didn’t allow Carl to come over to my house while all of the packing was going on.
“Leave to go where?”
“Atlanta,” I managed to get that out my mouth. I had not said that word since the day my mom told me. Jokingly he said, “Well I guess I would have to get me a new girlfriend!” That di